Islamic Manual

Who you cannot marry: fosterage (breastfeeding)

Breastfeeding within the first two years creates a family bond that prohibits marriage in the same way blood kinship does.

When a baby drinks a woman's milk, called breastfeeding, called rada'ah, it creates a family bond almost like being born into that family, even though there is no blood relation.

Who becomes family through breastfeeding

  1. The woman who breastfeeds the baby becomes its foster mother.
  2. Her husband, whose marriage to her led to the milk, becomes the baby's foster father.
  3. Any other children who drank milk from the same woman become the baby's foster brothers and sisters.
  4. The foster mother and father's own parents become the baby's foster grandparents.

Because of this bond, the same people a child cannot marry because of blood (a mother, sister, daughter, aunt, niece), a child also cannot marry if the same relationship exists through breastfeeding instead.

Forbidden (Ḥarām)must not do

Whoever a child could not marry because of blood, it also cannot marry if the same relationship comes from breastfeeding: a foster mother, foster sister, foster daughter, foster aunt or foster niece. The woman who breastfeeds, her husband and their family all become the child's relatives.

Forbidden (Ḥarām)must not do

Breastfeeding only creates this bond if the baby is two years old or younger, and if even a little milk is swallowed. Milk drunk after the age of two does not count.

The Third Cause: Radha'ah (breastfeeding). A child drinking a woman's milk within the prescribed time frame establishes a kinship similar to lineage. The woman becomes the child's foster mother; her husband, on whose account the milk was produced, becomes the foster father; other children who drank her milk (before, with, or after the child) become foster siblings; and the parents of the foster parents become foster grandparents.

Wherever fosterage creates the same relationship that lineage prohibits, marriage is prohibited on the same terms.

Prohibited by fosterage (radha'ah)
By blood, prohibited as Prohibited foster equivalent
Mother, grandmother Foster mother, foster maternal and paternal grandmothers
Daughter, granddaughter Foster daughter, foster granddaughters (maternal or paternal)
Sister Foster sister
Paternal aunt Foster paternal aunt
Maternal aunt Foster maternal aunt
Niece (brother's or sister's daughter) Foster niece

The foster father's own wife, and the foster in-laws and foster ascendants or descendants of a spouse created through fosterage, are prohibited on the same basis as their blood equivalents. Relations with no fosterage connection at all (such as the breastfed child's biological father and the foster mother) remain unprohibited, as does anyone whose relation to the child is only as permissible in lineage as a cousin.

Forbidden (Ḥarām)must not do

Fosterage (rada'ah) prohibits marriage exactly as lineage does: the foster mother and grandmothers, foster daughter and granddaughters, foster sister, foster paternal and maternal aunts, and foster niece are all haram. The nursing woman, her husband on whose account the milk came, and their relatives all become related to the child.

Some foster relationships that would be prohibited if they existed by blood are, by exception, permitted: for example, the foster mother of one's biological siblings, the foster sister of one's own sons or daughters, and the foster paternal or maternal aunt of one's siblings or of one's own children. Nikah with all such foster relatives is permissible.

Conditions for the prohibition to be established

  1. The child must be two years old or younger at the time of the feeding; nothing drunk after that age creates the bond.
  2. At least one drop of milk must pass down the throat; if the milk is vomited straight back up afterwards, the bond is still established.
  3. The milk must reach the stomach through the mouth or nose; an injection, an enema, or milk entering through the ears does not count.
  4. The milk must come from a woman of any age, living or deceased; milk from a man's chest, or from an animal, never creates this bond.
  5. The nursing woman must be at least nine years old, and the milk must not be yellowish; whether it came from childbirth or appeared on its own does not matter.
  6. If the milk is mixed with something else, such as medicine or water, the milk must still be the larger part of the mixture; mixed into food in any proportion, it no longer creates the bond.
  7. The milk must be given in its natural state, direct from the breast or expressed unchanged; turned into curd or another derivative first, it no longer creates the bond.
Forbidden (Ḥarām)must not do

The prohibition of fosterage is established only where the child is two years old or younger at the time of feeding, and it is established by even a single swallow of milk; whether the child drank little or much makes no difference. Nothing drunk after two years of age creates the bond.

The Third Cause (Raḍāʿah): a child drinking a woman's milk within the prescribed period establishes a kinship (qarābah) parallel to nasab. The nursing woman becomes the child's foster mother (umm min ar-raḍāʿah); her husband, on whose account the milk was produced, becomes the foster father; every other child who drank that milk (whether contemporaneously, before, or after) becomes a foster sibling; and the ascendants of the foster parents become foster grandparents.

Prohibited by fosterage (raḍāʿah)
Prohibited by qarābah as Prohibited foster equivalent
Mother, grandmother (uṣūl) Umm raḍāʿī, and foster maternal and paternal grandmothers up to the last link
Daughter, granddaughter (furūʿ) Bint raḍāʿī, and foster granddaughters (maternal or paternal) up to the last link
Sister Ukht raḍāʿiyyah
Paternal aunt ʿAmmah raḍāʿiyyah
Maternal aunt Khālah raḍāʿiyyah
Niece (brother's or sister's daughter) Foster niece and her descendants

Muṣāharah created through raḍāʿah is likewise recognised: a foster father's own wife, and the foster in-laws or foster uṣūl/furūʿ of a spouse arising from raḍāʿah, are prohibited on the same terms as their blood equivalents. Where no foster relation is created at all (the breastfed child's biological father and the foster mother, for instance), no prohibition arises, and offspring of a foster aunt or uncle remain as unprohibited as their nasab counterparts.

Forbidden (Ḥarām)must not do

Fosterage (rada'ah) prohibits what lineage (nasab) prohibits: the foster mother and her ascendants (usul), the foster daughter and her descendants (furu), the foster sister, the foster paternal and maternal aunts, and the foster niece are haram to marry. The relation is established from the nursing woman's side, including her husband, on whose account the milk was produced, and their relatives.

Conditions for the prohibition of raḍāʿah to be established

  1. The rāḍiʿ (nursing child) must be two years of age or under at the time of the feeding; beyond that age no foster relation is established, and nursing beyond the prescribed period is itself discouraged, milk being the child's exclusive right within that period.
  2. At least a single drop of milk must reach the throat and be swallowed; sucking without any milk reaching the throat establishes nothing. Where the milk is swallowed and then vomited immediately after, the relation is nonetheless established.
  3. The milk must reach the stomach via the mouth or nose; introduction through the ear, by injection, or by enema does not establish the relation.
  4. The milk must come from a woman of any age, living or deceased (a deceased woman's milk still establishes the relation); milk from a man's chest establishes nothing even if drunk.
  5. The nursing woman must be at least nine years old, and the milk must not be yellowish; whether the milk resulted from childbirth or appeared spontaneously makes no difference.
  6. Animal milk (cow, buffalo, goat) establishes no relation, even where both a boy and a girl drink it within the raḍāʿah period.
  7. Where the milk is mixed with another substance such as medicine or water, the milk must remain the ghālib (predominant) component. Mixed into any food, in any proportion, it establishes nothing.
  8. The milk must be consumed in its unaltered state: directly from the breast, or expressed without modification. Turned into curd or another derivative before being fed, it establishes nothing even if consumed.
Forbidden (Ḥarām)must not do

The prohibition of rada'ah is established only where the nursing child (radi) is two years of age or under at the time of feeding, and it is established by little or much: a single drop of milk reaching the throat suffices. Nursing beyond the two-year period establishes no foster relation.

This is the English translation of Nisab Ahle Khidmaat Sharia, exactly as the book has it, for the passages this page was written from. About 1,511 words. Switch back to Guide for the rewritten version.

Rulings of Nikah

Third Cause (Radha’ah – Breastfeeding):

  1. Breastfeeding refers to a child drinking the milk of a woman within the specified time frame [details of the time frame are provided ahead].
  2. Breastfeeding establishes a kinship similar to that of lineage between the child being breastfed and the woman breastfeeding. For example, the woman breastfeeding the child becomes the child’s foster mother, and her husband, due to whom the milk was produced, becomes the child’s foster father. Similarly, their children (whether biological or fostered [i.e., all those who drank the milk of that woman, regardless of whether they consumed it together with the child, before the child, or after]) will be the foster siblings of the child. The parents of the foster parents [whether biological or fostered] will become the child's foster grandparents, including foster maternal and paternal grandparents.However, it should be remembered that the woman breastfeeding [i.e., the woman herself, her husband due to whom the milk was produced, their ascendants, their descendants, and the descendants of their ascendants] will become related to the breastfed child. However, from the child’s side, only the child itself, their spouse, and descendants [if the breastfed child is a woman, her husband is included] will have a relationship. The child’s ascendants [i.e., parents and grandparents (maternal and paternal)] and the descendants of ascendants [i.e., siblings, uncles, aunts, etc.] will not have any relationship or connection with the breastfeeding woman. This matter is concisely and effectively expressed in the following couplet:

از جانب شیرده ہمہ خویش شوندو ز جانب شیر خواره زوجان و فروع

]Translation: From the side of the breastfeeding woman, all become relatives; from the side of the breastfed child, only the couple and their descendants.[

  1. The prohibition of marriage is also established through breastfeeding, as it is through lineage. Those with whom a foster relationship is established due to breastfeeding, and marriage with whom is prohibited in lineage, will also be prohibited due to breastfeeding. For example, foster mother, foster maternal and paternal grandmothers, foster daughters, foster granddaughters (maternal or paternal), foster sisters, foster nieces, foster aunts, etc. Similarly, those with whom no foster relationship is established are not prohibited from marriage, such as the biological father of the breastfed child and the foster mother or the biological sister of the breastfed child and the foster brother. Likewise, those with whom a relationship is established but marriage is permissible through lineage will also be permissible here, such as the offspring of foster paternal uncles, foster paternal aunts, foster maternal uncles, or foster maternal aunts.
  2. Similarly, the marital relations established by foster relationships must also be considered. For instance, foster marital relationships prohibit marriage. Examples include foster in-laws or foster ascendants or descendants of spouses.

Important Point: Drinking the milk of one’s wife does not establish prohibition; however, the husband will be sinful if it was done without necessity.

Important Point: If a man has two wives, Saeeda and Hameeda, and Hameeda is less than two years old while Saeeda breastfeeds her, both wives will become prohibited for that man ]because they will become foster mother and daughter, and a man cannot keep a mother and daughter together in marriage[.

Important Point: If a man marries a woman who has never had children and yet milk comes into her breasts which a girl drinks, then the prohibition of breastfeeding will be established only on her part. Meaning, that woman will become the foster mother of the girl, but her husband will not be her foster father [similarly, if a woman produces milk due to adultery, prohibition of breastfeeding will only be established from the mother’s side, and the adulterer will not be considered the foster father]. However, the man cannot marry the girl because she is his foster daughter. Nevertheless, he may have her marry his son (from another wife).

Important Point: If a man divorces his wife who still produces milk and she remarries after completing her waiting period, and then breastfeeds a child, this milk will be considered that of the first husband unless the milk ceases, and a child is born from the second husband. [In such a case, the breastfed child will be the foster son of the first husband and a foster child of the second husband's wife.]

Note 1: If a child is breastfed by multiple women, kinship will be established with all those women, regardless of the quantity of milk consumed from each.

Note 2: The prohibition of marriage for the foster child with the children of the breastfeeding woman, as explained, includes all their descendants, whether the breastfeeding child and those descendants drank milk at the same time or over many years at different times.

Exceptions:

Although the general rule for determining permissibility and prohibition through breastfeeding has been explained above, some exceptional foster relationships are detailed here for further clarification. These are foster relationships that, unlike their counterparts in lineage, are permissible. [Besides these, other foster relatives are also permissible. Their details and examples could not be included here for brevity.]

  1. The Mother of a Sibling
  2. The foster mother of biological siblings.
  3. The biological mother of foster siblings.
  4. The foster mother of foster siblings.
  5. The Sister of a Son or Daughter
  6. The foster sister of biological sons and daughters.
  7. The biological sister of foster sons and daughters.
  8. The foster sister of foster sons and daughters.
  9. The Paternal Aunt of a Son or Daughter
  10. The foster paternal aunt of biological sons and daughters.
  11. The biological paternal aunt of foster sons and daughters.
  12. The foster paternal aunt of foster sons and daughters.
  13. The Paternal Aunt of a Sibling
  14. The foster paternal aunt of biological siblings.
  15. The biological paternal aunt of foster siblings.
  16. The foster paternal aunt of foster siblings.
  17. The Maternal Aunt of a Sibling
  18. The foster maternal aunt of biological siblings.
  19. The biological maternal aunt of foster siblings.
  20. The foster maternal aunt of foster siblings.
  21. The Niece of a Sibling
  22. The foster niece of biological siblings.
  23. The biological niece of foster siblings.
  24. The foster niece of foster siblings.
  25. The Niece (Sister's Daughter) of a Sibling
  26. The foster niece (sister’s daughter) of biological siblings.
  27. The biological niece (sister’s daughter) of foster siblings.
  28. The foster niece (sister’s daughter) of foster siblings.
  29. The Mother of a Grandchild
  30. The foster mother of biological grandchildren.
  31. The biological mother of foster grandchildren.
  32. The foster mother of foster grandchildren.
  33. The Maternal Grandmother of a Son or Daughter
  34. The foster maternal grandmother of biological sons and daughters.
  35. The biological maternal grandmother of foster sons and daughters.
  36. The foster maternal grandmother of foster sons and daughters.

Conditions for Prohibition Through Breastfeeding:

The following conditions must be met for a foster relationship to be established and prohibition to be confirmed through breastfeeding:

  1. The child who drinks the milk must be no older than two years of age.]This means the child must be two years old or younger at the time of breastfeeding[. If the child is older than two years, no foster relationship will be established. [Breastfeeding beyond the prescribed period is discouraged, as milk is part of a human body, and benefiting from it without a legitimate need is impermissible. Milk is exclusively the child’s right within the prescribed period set by Islamic law.]
  2. The milk must pass down the throat, even if it is only a single drop. If the child sucks on the breast but does not swallow even a drop into the throat, no relationship is established.

Note: If the milk goes into the throat and is then vomited—even immediately—a foster relationship will still be established.

  1. The milk must reach the stomach through the mouth or nose. Introducing milk into the body through the ears, injections, or enema will not establish a foster relationship.
  2. The milk must come from a woman, regardless of her age (young, elderly, alive, or deceased) [The milk of a deceased woman establishes a foster relationship]. If milk comes from a man’s chest, no foster relationship is established, even if consumed.

Note: Drinking the milk of animals, such as cows, buffaloes, or goats, will not establish a foster relationship. [If a boy and a girl drink an animal's milk within the breastfeeding period, no relationship will be established between them].

  1. The woman providing the milk must be at least nine years old. The prohibition applies regardless of whether the milk is due to childbirth or arises spontaneously, provided that the milk is not yellowish in colour. [No foster relationship is established if the wet nurse is younger than nine years old.]
  2. If the milk is mixed with another substance, such as medicine or water, the milk must remain the predominant component in the mixture for the foster relationship to be established.
  3. If milk is mixed with any food and consumed, no foster relationship will be established, regardless of whether the milk is the dominant component or not.
  4. The milk must be fed in its original state, [either directly from the breast or after being expressed without modification]. If the milk is turned into curd or another derivative before feeding, and the child consumes it, no foster relationship will be established.

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